I for one, LOVE Christmas. Everything about it... the smell, the tinsel, the candy, the music, the stories, the cold. I want to wrap it up in a big box and cuddle with it every night! Yes, Christmas would be so soft and snuggly. Maybe I'll name my new Pottery Barn throw blanket "Christmas". Sean picked it out, of course, and I will now call it Christmas.
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| Meet 'Christmas' |
As a little girl I would imagine Santa sneaking into my house, trolling around looking for cookies, and watch me as I slept. I made sure to keep the cookies near the tree and wear my best pajamas on Christmas eve. I never understood how the reindeer were so quiet. Surely they would be louder than say, the garbage man? Why did I never wake up? I would go to bed so excited that I would get a peek at Santa. I'd try and stay awake as long as possible in hopes that I wouldn't miss him. Then, BAM. Christmas morning came and that sneaky Santa pulled another fast one on me. I'd rush to the tree and find zillions of presents glittering for my sister and I! I remember how we would paw through them and divide them into 'Marina' and 'Angela' piles. I would silently assess the packages to make sure she didn't get more than me. After all, she was the naughty child.
This time of year always brings up memories, some good and some sad. This will be the fifth Christmas without my dad. I remember the first holiday season without him was dark for me. I tried to put on a happy face but celebrating felt wrong when I missed him so much. A time of joy turned into a time of great sorrow.
This year will be the first Christmas for my little Angel from heaven, Colette. I am overdoing the celebrations this year in honor of her. In fact I am hosting Christmas eve, Christmas morning and Christmas dinner at my house! All so the family can share every moment of her first Christmas. With that, I again can't help but feel sad that my dad can't be with us to see Coco open her presents. I imagine his contagious laugh and sparkling blue eyes filled with joy. My heart breaks that I will never see my dad hold his granddaughter.
The intention of this blog was not to make me cry (which it did) it was to make a point that life is a gift and celebrations are a must! I know my dad wouldn't want us to cancel Christmas and cry. He would want us to celebrate Jesus and remember how blessed we truly are. His presence is still very strong in my heart. I will always remember that love is eternal. This Christmas we will eat, drink and be merry! And in honor of my dad, maybe get a little drunk...
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| Forever Daddy's Girl |
